Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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