She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
