And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
