brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
