Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
It's rum buckets o'clock
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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