So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
