So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
