But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
