Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
