If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
In America we eat man semen.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
