I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
