wake up i wanna do it froggy style
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
