Im at strip club and am horny
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
