hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
We left the knife in your bed.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
