No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
we should paint friendship bongs
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
