Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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