Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
