I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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