i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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