Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Randomize
