so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
