just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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