she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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