We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize