This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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