If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
