I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
