PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
