Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
