I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
