people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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