So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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