i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
