i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
