I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
