Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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