Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize