ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
