Yo dont text me then not text me
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize