oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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