what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Everyone says I win the strip club
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Randomize
