Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
