He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
So squirting runs in the family.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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