Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
