"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
