we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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