let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
