I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize