It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I touched a dick in church today
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize