operation harelip BJ is a go
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
